Thursday, August 13, 2009


So you have all been so awesome in your responses (through comments, e-mails, FB messages, and phone calls) to my pity party. This is why I love keeping the blog. Part of me just needs to get some of this stuff off my chest and let it go, which writing it out does. And I admit I need the affirmation and support that keeps me trucking. So when I thanked God and Shawn for keeping me on this journey, I should have thanked all of you, too!

I wanted to share one response in particular from a fellow mom of a special needs child. All the responses touched my heart and made my burden a little lighter today, but this one really hit home. I am going to save it on my computer and re-read it on those days when I need it. (And to the writer - there is a book of essays I am reading called "A Cup of Comfort for Parents of Children with Special Needs" - you should submit something to an editor someday!)

"I just want you to know that I really believe that you are a better Mom to all of your children, because of the challenges with Clare. You are a better person and friend because of it too. In school, you will see the families with challenges like yours or mine, there is always someone better off than you, if you compare (which you should not do, but us Mom’s do quite a bit!!!) and someone struggling more than you. There will be a time you are jealous of other families because their disabled kid masters something quicker than Clare does. Then years later that family will struggle with something their disability serves up that humbles you immediately because at one time you thought their grass was greener, and you watched them today and counted your blessings! Being a Mom in your shoes changes your perspective completely, makes us more humble, more accepting of differences and more focused on what is important, more human. As your typical kids get older you will smile to yourself as typical parents of usually one or two children fret over stuff that seems so small to you. Not in a smug way. I mean in a freer, I am not burdened by that anymore type of way because I have given it to God. We watched our special needs children struggle to do what so many people take for granted, and been given the gift of appreciating the regular day, and we are constantly reminded that a regular day is a blessing."


Noel said...

Totally true!

Tes said...

So very true. (sigh)

Aunt Joan said...

What a beautiful letter. Thanks for sharing it with all of us!