This pregnancy has thrown a lot of "morning" sickness my way. I was fairly nauseous during the first trimester of Simon's pregnancy as well, so I am not surprised, but it still is rough. My general feeling of yuckiness has actually gotten better - from an all-day thing to usually just 2 pm on. But it still throws me for a loop. I hate that I constantly feel like I have a big dead weight in my stomach. I hate that my house is a mess, prepared meals are a distant memory, and the afternoons find me prone on the couch while the kids play around me. I hate that if Simon pushes too hard on my stomach or Clare elbows me in just the wrong way, I will have to make a mad dash to the bathroom. (Although I admit it is cute that Clare now will spontaneously start play-coughing, run to the bathroom, make some fake gagging noises over the toilet, then come back out to me. With a big grin on her face, she will wipe her mouth with her hand and say with a big sigh, "all better." You little stinker...)
At the same time, though, I cannot help but marvel over this new little life, gagging and all. For those who don't know me well, becoming pregnant is not an easy thing for me. To put it briefly, Jamie, Clare, and Simon were all extremely well-planned. Baby Bonita is a shocker. I never thought I would just get pregnant. In fact, at my six-week postpartum OB visit after Simon was born, my OB brought up birth control. I don't believe in artificial birth control, and we practice Natural Family Planning. Plus, as I cheerfully reminded my doctor, avoiding pregnancy was never our problem. My OB knows my views on this, but she still equally cheerfully reminded me that just because I needed some help becoming pregnant in the past and just because I was nursing did not mean I could not become pregnant. Well, I am thrilled to say she was right!
So while I am hovering over the toilet, I remind myself that all of life is a phase. This too will pass. Hopefully in the next week or so (now that I am almost in my second trimester). Then I will have other equally delightful pregnancy woes to moan about!