Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Choices

We recently made a decision in our life. Nothing earth-shattering or even something that in a few years we will really think about. But, in the moment, this decision was eating me up for some reason. To me, it's all about leaving the comfort and security of a place I know well, people I truly like, and a situation I am used to, familiar with. To begin again in a new place with new people, but one that will be easier for us logistically and financially and hopefully make our life slightly simpler.

There are always choices to be made as a parent. And I struggle constantly with whether or not I am making the right choices. Some of these choices are so tiny in the grand scheme of life. I remember how much I agonized eighteen months ago about putting Clare on the bus to school. I went back and forth in my mind, with Shawn, in my mind again. We ended up letting Clare ride the bus to school because it truly was what worked out best for our family at that time, and it turned out to be a non-issue. In fact, Clare loved every minute of it. Then there are the huge decisions to be made when it comes to our children's health, particularly Clare's. In some ways, though, those decisions are easier to make because you weigh your child's life against the risk of a procedure or other medical decision. And your child's life wins every time.

When I attended my Moms' Day Away, we talked both in our large group and small group about cutting out the extras from our life. Those little things we do or traps we fall into that really make our life more complicated than it has to be. Does my child have to play two sports plus learn to play an instrument? Do I have to empty all the hampers every day or will the earth continue on its rotation if I let the laundry pile up a bit? Do I have to be president of the PTO or even attend every meeting or is it okay to simply be one of the parents who bakes for the teacher's luncheon once a year? As our family grows in size and busy-ness, I am slowly coming to peace with the fact that I cannot do all I want to do. I cannot be everything I want to be. And I think I am okay with that. Because it makes me less stressed and a happier wife and mother. Which makes my husband and kids happier. Which makes life so much sweeter!

2 comments:

Nikki Thompson said...

I'm so happy to see you continued your blog! I last read it when you were saying farewell and I was so bummed yet completely understood wanting one less task. I really appreciate your post today on 'choices'. I know writing your blog is both cathartic and communicative to your family and friends but wanted you to know how much it resonated with me. So much has changed in our life this year and it has forced me to make 'choices' of my own and accept that I can't do all I want to do. Your entry reminds me that the Mother Earth will still rotate if my laundry is behind. That my children will still live rich lives even if they are not involved in a million activities. But most importantly your blog has reminded me that creating/downsizing to such simplicity in life leaves such richness. Clearly my comment has been very cathartic for me, so thanks for letting me babble! And congrats on baby #5!

nichole said...

It's hard to let stuff go, regardless of how big or small. I have a hard time with it myself and I don't have a husband, four active, wonderful children, and a baby on the way. It does feel good when you do. And you're right, most of the time we agonize over letting go of things that in a few weeks or months we won't even remember. It's kind of like purging your closet :) I know I might wear it again, but I probably won't miss it if it's gone.

Hope you are well and the last few weeks of this pregnancy go well for you!